Ohio State Diary: Saturday

Note: I kept a minute-by-minute diary of the entire day where Jacob Levine and I went to the Michigan-Notre Dame game and the Texas-Ohio State game in the same day. What follows is a narrative, with bits and pieces of the diary mixed in. Like the other parts of the Nateblogg, it's a little bit like flinging turds at a wall and seeing which ones stick, so we'll all see if it works. And on to the entry...

Relaxing in the bathtub in a Columbus motel room at 1:30 last Saturday night, I started laughing. Jacob had already crashed on his bed in the other room, worn out and sick, so I doubt he heard me. For the first time that day, it began to sink in. We did it, and so did the Texas Longhorns...

Our day started 23 hours earlier, when we stepped out the door of the apartment where Jacob and his wife Ali live, jumped into our rental car, and began the first leg of our journey, from Louisville, Kentucky to Ann Arbor, Michigan. We loaded the "Vince Young and the Longhorns Comin'" CD into the dash and took to the highway.

4:17 AM - After Jacob went to bed late last night, I talked to his wife Ali for awhile. I complimented her on the apartment, which was spotless and tastefully appointed, and she replied, "Well, Jacob does all the cooking and cleaning. He never advertised this when we were dating." I was taken aback by this - when I lived with Jacob (and 8 other guys) in the BYX house in college, Jacob had the messiest room by far, and here he is, seven years later, keeping his apartment immaculate, so much so that they won an interior decorating contest in their apartment complex (!). I guess a man in love will do anything...

I dozed off before the CD was done, and Jacob drove us north through the wee hours of the morning. He told me later in the day that he took three Vivarin in Louisville and four more in Ann Arbor, which begged the question: Hadn't he seen the episode of Saved by the Bell where Jesse Spano became addicted to caffeine pills? Wasn't he afraid of self-destructing while singing an incoherent rendition of "I'm So Excited"? These are the things I wonder about when I'm on the road...

Here are a few tidbits about Jacob, for those who know him and those who don't:

1) Jacob is (still) a meticulous planner. He brought along a manila folder neatly organized with Mapquest directions for each leg of our journey and my flight itinerary.
2) Jacob, one of the biggest wrestling fans I ever new, hasn't followed the WWE in about five years. If you own stock in the WWE, I would suggest that you sell it as soon as possible...
3) Jacob still can't drive a stick shift, saying, "Since they invented something that does the shifting for me, why do I need to learn?" Every man should be able to drive a stick shift. This is important. Needless to say, I am greatly vexed...

We arrived in Ann Arbor at about 7:15, and parked the car in a driveway one block from the Michigan campus (Jacob had arranged it through a woman he knew at work.). By 8, we were tailgating with Chris, Dan, Ivan, and Jason, Jacob's friends from Nashville, on the golf course next to the Big House. The atmosphere was festive - there were thousands of Michigan fans cooking all manner of meat. The weather was spectacular - the sky was brilliantly blue and the sun shone brightly on the towering spruces and maples. The folks next to us played washers and cornhole, which is essentially washers with beanbags. A gentleman came up to us and offered to sell us a "[censored] the Irish" shirt and a "Hey Rudy, Up Yours!" shirt (I thought about getting it for Kelly, who adores Sean Astin, but didn't have the cash on me...).

I was curious to see how we would be received in Ann Arbor after Vince ran all over the Wolverines in the Rose Bowl. Dressed in our burnt orange garb, we got one of the following two reactions:

1) "You guys are at the wrong [censored] game!" (We're going to ours too...) or
2) "Beat the [censored] out of Ohio State!" (We plan to.)

The Michigan fans treated us well (more on this later). We were welcomed and wished luck by virtually everyone we met. Since we were playing Ohio State that day, I guess they considered us allies...

9:58 AM - I understand that the Port-a-Potties are not a good option, so Dan, who resembles a tall midget in his proportions, has crawled into the car to pee in a Gatorade bottle. Just thought I'd mention this.

At 11:30, our tailgating finished, we walked across the street among a crowd of thousands from the golf course to the Big House. The Big House (also known as Michigan Stadium) seats more people (107,501) than any football stadium in America, and seats them all in one vast bowl of maize and blue. Our seats were even with the goal line, 20 rows up, which I though afforded an excellent view. The fans around us were friendly, classy, and laid-back. We joined with them to root for the Wolverines whole-heartedly.

The pre-game ceremonies were old-fashioned. The band came onto the field playing the Michigan fight song "Hail to the Victors." The drum major bent back to touch his head to the turf, like a contortionist, and the crowd cheered. The team came out and touched a simple cloth "Michigan Football" banner in the middle of the field. For the national anthem, we were blessed with the booming voice of an Irish tenor three rows behind us. The Michigan Wolverines then kicked off to Notre Dame, and we were off.

Notre Dame moved the ball down the field with ease on their first drive, running and passing the ball at will for a touchdown. After this, the game settled into a monotonous pattern of one team punting it to the other, which allowed us to chat with the fans around us. When told of our plan, they warned us repeatedly about the nastiness of the Ohio State fans. A sampling of their caveats to us:

"They will riot no matter what the outcome."
"The police in Ohio will pull over anyone with an out-of-state plate."
"You guys have a Kentucky plate on your car? You may be okay..."
"You may want to bring a hardhat - they throw batteries, you know."

In the second quarter, Michigan kicked a field goal and the Irish added another touchdown to make the halftime score 14-3 Irish. The Irish defense looked good - this was almost the same Michigan team that hung 37 on an excellent Longhorn D in the Rose Bowl. The crowd was quiet, but not nervous.

1:48 - Michigan band halftime show:

Rock & Roll - Led Zeppelin
The Final Countdown - Europe (never an encouraging sign when a band has a geographical name...)
You Shook Me All Night Long - AC/DC
Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
Hail to the Victors

Very sharp. The student section is singing along to Bohemian Rhapsody, thanks to Mike Myers. By the way, if I ever move to Michigan, I'm naming my firstborn son "Victor", and sending him to the University of Michigan...

Just before the second half started, I got a call from Aaron. Oklahoma 7, Tulsa 6 at the half. The Sooners were in trouble...

Michigan started the second half with a nice 5-1/2 minute drive deep into Irish territory, which ended abruptly on an interception. Neither team did much of anything up until Jacob and I left near the end of the third quarter. Before we left, the Michigan fans behind us gave us each a Michigan football baseball cap and wished us luck. Classiest fans in the world - I plan to root for Michigan anytime they play someone other than Texas...

We jumped into the car at 2:45 PM, and started our trip to Columbus. Jeff called me at about this time to let me know that Tulsa had jumped up 9-7 on the Sooners. Even in the heart of the Midwest, OU still sucks...

We listened to the end of the Michigan-Notre Dame game on the radio. Michigan got a late touchdown to make it close, but the Irish held strong, and won 17-10. Before this game, Michigan was #3 in the country. We were about to see #2 (Texas) and #4 (Ohio State).

The drive went smoothly for the most part, but we did have a small adventure with Smokey...

3:16 PM - Ain't seen a Smokey yet. Jacob, put that hammer down and give 'em hell!

3:22 PM - We just passed a state trooper who pulled into the road just after we shot past. We ducked him - instead, he caught the Hyundai Tuscon in front of us. I don't think we were speeding anyway, but that made for a tense thirty seconds...

Bounded by endless corn on both sides, I took the opportunity to phone Tommy, who is usually my running buddy on this type of trip (Fiesta Bowl, Final Four, etc.). A few things he mentioned in our conversation:

"I don't care if they have a defensive end who benched 600 pounds and [censored] bears..."
"We're not losing to a team coached by a man in a sweater."
"If you see (former Buckeye running back) Maurice Clarett, tell him that you want two Cokes, not one."
"If Ohio State plays the spread offense, that plays into our hands."
"Prediction - 25-10 Texas, with 3 missed extra points and a two-point conversion for Texas."

(I predicted 27-23 Texas, with a missed extra point.)

4:34 - I saw a license plate that calls Ohio "The Birthplace of Aviation", a claim that also appears on the Ohio state quarters. The basis of this claim is that the Wright Brothers and Neil Armstrong were both born here. I'm not sure how I feel about this - North Carolina's motto is "First in Flight" thanks to the Wright Brothers and Kitty Hawk, and it seems to me that Ohio is trying to horn in on North Carolina's thunder. Something to be proud of? Of course, but to use it as the identity of the state seems a tad trivial. Why not call themselves, "The Buckeye State on the quarter and the license plate - that's the official name of the state already, and it pays homage to the farmers who have worked the Ohio soil for generations. Why not mention the automobile industry, which had a much more significant impact on the state? I'm just suggesting that there are better things than the birth of three men to put on the back of a coin or car that will define the state to those who see it, that's all.

We rolled into Columbus around 6 PM, and met the broker at a Holiday Inn about two miles from the Ohio State campus. I was relieved to have the tickets in my hand - this seemed to me to be the shakiest part of our plan. We even received a free parking pass with them, which proved useless when we attempted to look for parking near the stadium. We saw nothing but thousands upon thousands of people, mostly Ohio State fans. We circled back to the hotel, but not before a guy on a motorcycle burned his rear tire in front of us for a few seconds, to the delight of the watching crowd. Jacob and I decided to park and walk the two miles to the stadium.

On the first part of the walk, we had several drivers on the street honk, roll down the window, give us the bird or a simple "[censored] Texas!", and drive on. I would flash my "Hook 'em Horns" back and keep walking - this was all in good fun. We then made a turn into the Lane Avenue district, which (and we didn't know this) is the primary student party area in Columbus. Almost every house had a large group of students drinking beer and tailgating (which I'm totally cool with). When each group would see us, they would start yelling, which alerted the next group, who would do the same thing, etc. Jacob and I honestly (HONESTLY!) were completely classy here, taking the barbs and taunts all in stride, but even so, things started to escalate. The students started throwing beer cans, food, and at least one liquor bottle in our direction. I got hit in the shoulder by a half-full beer can, and had some barbeque sauce thrown on me too. Fortunately, this was near the end of the street, and we were able to make our way onto the Ohio State Campus before things got worse. Though we met some good folks in the Horseshoe, these Buckeye fans were the worst I've ever encountered by far, and I've seen Sooner fans, Aggy fans, and Texas Tech fans (who once stabbed a goalpost into the visiting fans section after a win) virtually every year. You just have to shake your head sometimes...

Our burnt orange shirts splattered with beer and barbeque sauce, we found our seats in the Horseshoe a little after 7 PM, with an hour until kickoff. Our seats were in the corner of the end zone, approximately 5 rows below the top of the uppermost deck. The Horseshoe is the most impressive college stadium I've ever seen - it's enormous and modern, but gives virtually everyone in the house a good view of the entire field. Our seats offered a nice vantage point on the North End Zone, near which the Texas Band was seated, and where the game would ultimately be decided...

Our neighbors included two Ohio State band alumni on our left, an elderly couple on our right, and recent Buckeye grads all around. They expressed regret at how we were treated on Lane Avenue, and treated us well the whole game. The elderly couple even gave us buckeyes as souveniers...

For the game, I'm going back to the scribbled diary. Let's relive it, minute-by-minute. Yes, that rhymes. Start the times...

7:22 - The Horns just came out on the field for warmups, and are egging on the crowd as the band strikes up "Texas Fight" and shakes their cowbells. It's always worth repeating - you can never have enough cowbell...

7:38 - Jacob, never ceasing to think of everything, brought earplugs for us both. I tried mine on, but decided to go without them. If this crowd ain't loud enough to faze Vince, it ain't loud enough to faze me either. Bring it on, baby!

7:48 - "Eyes of Texas" and "Texas Fight" in a hostile six-figure environment. I'm amped!

7:50 - Here comes the Ohio State band. The place is loud!

7:57 - Script Ohio is in progress...

7:58 - ...culminating in the dotting of the "i." That was freaking cool.

8:06 - The second national anthem of the day was moving. The coin flip is done. Here comes the kickoff. Bring it on, baby!

8:18 - We stopped the Buckeyes on their first drive, and Vince has already run for three first downs on our first drive. We're on the Ohio State 25 yard line. The team looks ready to play this game.

8:21 - Drive stalled. David Pino for the 25-yard field goal - Good!

8:23 - 3-0 Texas. Breathe...

8:28 - Ohio State gets their first First Down, but they worked for it. I like our defense right now. 3rd and 6 - we hold. Ohio State punt forthcoming.

On an unrelated note, we're packed in these seats like sardines, and something (or someone) is smelling a little ripe right now.

8:34 - Long pass to Billy Pittman. I don't think he ever caught a pass before tonight. We're moving the ball again...

8:37 - Bailed out by a pass interference penalty. Texas ball on Ohio State 21 yard line. We're doing well, but for my own welfare and that of Jacob, I'm playing it cool...

8:42 - Henry "The Mule" Melton gives Texas a First and Goal on short yardage...

8:43 - ...which sets up Vince for a quick touchdown pass on a slant to Billy Pittman, who is already having a career day. Extra point forthcoming... (we missed three last week)... good. Texas 10-0.

8:45 - A great kick return by Ohio State. Our kick return coverage has not improved since the Rose Bowl - we can't keep giving them good field position. Come on D...

8:47 - Troy Smith, Ohio State's previously suspended QB, has come in the game. This could bring a momentum shift...

8:49 - Quarter. Texas 10-0, but the Buckeyes are threatening. 3rd and 7 at Texas 33.

8:53 - Ohio State field goal. All are satisfied with that.

8:55 - "Deep in the Heart of Texas" - Ah, the sounds of home...

8:59 - The Buckeyes stop Texas on the next drive, sacking Vince on third down. Their ball on their own 20.

9:03 - Drew Kelson almost had a pick-6 in the flat. He just looked downfield before catching it.

9:05 - Troy Smith runs better than Justin Zwick (the starting QB), but he's full of adventure, with a fumble and a near-interception on the last three plays. Even so, the Buckeyes are at midfield...

9:10 - Touchdown Ohio State, on a perfectly-executed long pass from Smith to Santonio Holmes. Tie game.

9:12 - The Longhorns got in the first punch, and now they've counterpunched. Let's see what we've got...

9:14 - Ramonce "The Love" Taylor, probably the fastest player on the field, ran the ball to the end line, looked at the ref and realized that he couldn't get a touchback, broke a tackle in the end zone, then ran the ball all the way to the thirty, where a touchdown-saving tackle was made. My heart rate is about 200 right now...

9:16 - Interception by A.J. Hawk, the All-American Ohio State linebacker. Vince threw the ball as he was being tackled. The Buckeyes get the ball at the Texas 18.

9:21 - Texas holds on a 3rd and 3 from the 11, and Ohio State settles for a field goal. The defense held. Jacob said that this game feels like a heavyweight fight. I agree.

9:23 - The crowd is relatively quiet. Just as I write this, Selvin Young fumbled the ball, and the Buckeyes get the ball again on the Texas 30.

9:27 - The Texas defense gets two tackles-for-loss, bringing about a 3rd and 20... that Ohio State converts. Bugger. Ohio State first down at the 18.

9:30 - The Buckeyes get a first down at the Texas 5...

9:33 - ...and the defense comes through again, stopping them for 3 plays and forcing another field goal. 16-10 Ohio State. We're the better team here. We just need to stop giving them the ball.

I'm starting to speak about this team in the first-person plural. Since when did I turn into Dave South?

9:35 - Wow. With less than a minute left in the half, we got the ball at the 46-yard-line on the kickoff, and Jamaal Charles took a reception down to the Ohio State 18. Texas now has a 2nd down from the 12, with 12 seconds left.

9:38 - Ohio State gets a sack, and Texas calls a timeout and sets up for a 37-yard field goal attempt...

9:39 - ...which is just inside the upright and good. 16-13 Ohio State at the half, but the Longhorns have the momentum, and they get the ball first in the 3rd. Considering how bad the turnovers could have been, the Horns are in good shape.

9:43 - To begin halftime, Ohio State pays tribute to Woody Hayes. Woody Hayes was an successful coach in 28 years for the Buckeyes, keeping his team in the top 5 every year and winning 3 national titles (Ohio State says 5 on their website, but a couple are awarded by something called the FFL, so I'll stick with 3). What they didn't mention is that Woody Hayes was fired for punching an opposing player. He was an ornery old codger. As for me, I'll stick with one Darrell K. Royal, a man who was not only a great coach but a good man as well.

9:47 - The band is really sharp. Their halftime show:

Ride of the Valkries - Wagner
March of the Toreadors - Bizet
Nessun Dorma - Puccini (featuring Stan Workman as the Tenor
Prelude to Act III of Lohengin - Wagner

Some serious music for a college marching band halftime show. Verdict: Better than Michigan. The two band alums sitting next to me will be pleased to hear that.

9:50 - Jacob says that he is "sweating like a whore in church." The elderly lady next to him says she is sweating "like a Turk." I'm fine, but then again, I do have three kidneys...

9:57 - How do we win this? Nate's 3 keys to the second half (If the awful broadcasters for Fox Sports Southwest can do it, I can too...):

1) Keep playing great defense.
2) Take care of the ball on offense.
3) Turn Vince loose!

This is a heavyweight bout. Let's come out and punch 'em in the mouth like Woody Hayes...

10:03 - 2nd half starts. Texas gets the ball on the 20, and true freshman Jamaal Charles is starting at tailback.

10:05 - Another interception by Ohio State, this time off of a deflection, and another stand demanded from the Texas Defense.

10:07 - The Buckeyes stall at the Texas 27, and kick another field goal. 19-13 Ohio State.

10:11 - They are putting questions on the Jumbotron about NCAA rules concerning boosters, such as, "What is the definition of a student-athlete?" I wonder if NCAA compliance is much of a problem at Ohio State...

10:14 - Texas gets the ball back, and Billy Pittman has another long reception, this time to the Ohio State 5. Again, I don't think he ever caught the ball before today. 1st and goal for Texas from the 10 after a false start.

10:16 - Three running plays, and Texas is eventually stopped at the 9...

10:18 - ...and David Pino nails the field goal. Ohio State 19-16.

10:19 - Now let's pin them back on the kickoff... oh, wait... they have the ball at midfield again!

10:23 - Justin Zwick is back in the game. Ohio State has a couple of nice runs and completes a pass to the Texas 12.

10:28 - After a near fumble, and an injury, Ohio State has 3rd and 5 at the 8. The tight end nearly catches the ball for the touchdown, but bobbled and dropped it. Ohio State kicks the field goal from close range, and they lead 22-16.

10:33 - The Horns go 3 and out on their next possession, and Jake is looking pretty sick. He's hanging tough, though. The Buckeyes get the ball at their own 44.

10:35 - Zwick just scrambled for a first down in Texas territory.

10:36 - The Buckeyes miss on another deep fade route to Santonio Holmes, and punt the ball back to Texas. Horns ball on the 8 yard line.

10:39 - Just when I thought "Give Me a Phat Beat" would never be surpassed for Outstanding Achievement in Unintentional Comedy from Cheesy Jumbotron Animation, I just saw a (badly) animated Woody Hayes zap a ball incomplete from beyond the grave. I wonder if Woody ever zaps a player in the face...

10:41 - Texas goes 3-and-out, and Ohio State will have the ball at midfield again. Quarter, and "Hang on Sloopy" time...

10:42 - ...followed by the Wabash Cannonball.

10:45 - At the beginning of the 4th Quarter, Texas lights up a reverse to Ted Ginn (the big Buckeye playmaker who has been terribly quiet tonight), and get the ball back on their own 10. Keeping steady on field position, at least...

10:49 - Texas starts out conservative on offense, but convert a 3rd and long to Brian Carter of the Woodlands...

10:50 - ...followed by another catch by Billy Pittman. Texas ball at midfield.

10:52 - Texas has backed into a 3rd and 25, and Ellen just called to say that she found something funny, but I couldn't hear her well enough to find out what that was...

10:54 - Announced attendance: 105,965. Largest crowd in the history of the Horseshoe.

10:57 - Tressel brings in Justin Zwick and is playing it conservative, and just after I write this, Ohio State drives the ball to the Texas 40. We must get a stop here - the Ohio State kicker is good.

11:01 - The Buckeyes get a First down on the Texas 29.

11:04 - Texas drives the Buckeyes back to the 33, bringing up a 50-yard field goal attempt. If they hit it, they're up 25-16 with less than 6 minutes left...

11:06 - IT MISSED! A touchdown wins it! We're still in it!

Hostile crowd of 100,000+. Down by 6. Five minutes left. Vince time.

11:07 - After they missed the FG, I yelled "We still have a chance!" while surrounded by 2,000 silent Buckeye fans within earshot. I'm going to keep it quiet for the rest of the game...

11:08 - Texas draws a pass interference penalty, and have the ball at midfield. I just text-messaged Mark Proeger with the following:

"Wow. I have a good feeling about this."

11:09 - Four-yard gain by Vince. 2nd and 6.

11:10 - Incompletion. 3rd and 6. Texas takes a timeout. I take the opportunity to call Ellen and tell her that I feel good about our chances, and that I think we're going to win. She doesn't believe me. I guess this might be due to the fact that I'm a little crazy at this point...

11:13 - Vince completes a pass to Jamaal Charles for the First down.

11:15 - Vince just got hit hard on a short run, and is down. Nordren is warming up. This is trouble. He's slowly getting up. Texas takes a timeout to let him clear his head, but it looks like he's staying in.

11:17 - On 3rd and 1 from the 30, the Buckeyes jump offsides, and Texas gets a first down.

11:18 - Touchdown to Limas Sweed. Score is tied at 22. We get the extra point to make it 23-22 Texas.

11:19 - Notice the marked lack of excitement here. Jacob and I celebrated that dramatic, historic, clutch Longhorn touchdown with a knowing nod at each other. We are playing it cool right now - don't want to piss anyone off...

11:21 - 2:37 left in the game. The Buckeyes only need a field goal. We MUST pin them back this time.

11:24 - They fumbled the kickoff. Texas recovered! It goes to review...

11:25 - ...and it's overturned. What a finish!

11:26 - Justin Zwick fumbles the ball on a scramble, and Texas recovers the ball on the Ohio State 21. It ain't over yet, though...

11:27 - 12-yard run by Charles to the 9.

11:28 - 2-yard gain to Bucks 7 yard line.

11:30 - Vince to the 3-yard line. The Buckeyes call a timeout, but Jim Tressel took his sweet time doing it, to the chagrin of the fans around me.

11:34 - On 3rd and goal, Vince takes the ball to the 1-yard line. Texas calls a timeout with 29 seconds left. We're going for it...

11:35 - ...and the Mule falls short of the endzone by a foot. Ohio State football on the one-foot line with 25 seconds left.

11:36 - Safety. Ballgame.

Jacob and I stayed long enough to sing Texas Fight and the Eyes of Texas, and to watch the team celebrate with the fans in the end zone below us. We then navigated our way out of the stadium and through the hostile crowd without. At least one Buckeye fan tried to pick a fight with me, and was promptly cooled off by another really nice Buckeye fan (There were quite a few of those around too). The whole scene reminded me of The Warriors, the 1979 gang movie about a gang that has to fight through every other gang in New York to reach their home turf of Coney Island. We made our way back to the car by sticking with other Texas fans and by eventually by removing our Texas gear. We wandered into our room at the Ramada around 1 AM, bringing us back to where I started this story - me giggling in the bathtub, Jacob sick and sleeping in the other room, both of us content after having lived one of the greatest days of our lives.

Jacob was the one who came up with the idea for this trip and did all the planning - I was just along for the ride. We wouldn't have made it through as well as we did if not for his effort. That said, the day turned out better than we possibly could have imagined. The day was full of adventures, excitement, a little bit of danger, and ultimately turned out well - the Texas-Ohio State game was one for the ages. I truly believe that the Lord guided, protected, and blessed us. Even if the game didn't turn out well, I spent time with a dear friend that I've seen very little in the last six years. I pray that the Lord blesses and strengthens Jacob and Ali as they tackle the adventures and challenges that lay before them in the coming years. Thanks, Jacob. Godspeed.

That, and Hook 'Em.